I met with someone over lunch today who wanted to discuss how he could help with my local networking group for software testers. As I walked up to Abuelo’s, anticipating some good Tex-Mex, I had the same realization that I often have at the last minute when meeting someone at a public place. I had no idea what he looks like.
It’s actually a fairly easy problem to solve. As I walked up, I scanned for people who were by themselves. I saw a guy sitting on a bench outside. He looked bored, and didn’t glance up when I walked past. That was definitely not the guy. I went inside, and there was a guy sitting by himself across from the hostess stand. I looked at him and smiled, and his eyes lit up. I didn’t need to notice the fact that he was wearing a polo shirt with his company’s name on it, though that helped too. :-)
So if you’re more introverted than me, and find yourself worried about meeting up with someone you’ve never seen before, give this a try. Just scan the area looking for likely targets. Have an inquisitive but happy look on your face. You’ll come across someone who also just realized that they don’t know what you look like, and who is very relieved to find someone who is obviously trying to find them. It just took a “Hi, David?” to confirm I’d found the right person.
You can do this any time you’ve arranged to meet someone at a pre-arranged time and place, whether at a restaurant, a hotel during a conference, or in an office lobby.
And what if the person you approach isn’t the right one? You’ll both get a good laugh, then you both can get back to watching for your respective quarry.
May 30th, 2005 at 1:00 pm
Hey Danny, I just heard a funny story about that. Someone I know that we’ll call Steve was meeting someone named Mike for the 1st time and did exactly what you conveyed here. They met, sat at a table with some of Mike’s collegues and discussion began. It wasn’t long before Steve realized he had the wrong party.
He explained, excused himself, and returned to the front. Soon, another Steve came and asked if he was Mike. He said “No, your Mike is at that table.” Then his Mike arrived.
What are the chances?
May 31st, 2005 at 11:33 am
Thanks for the story, Paul! I suppose that doesn’t help people who have a lot of anxiety about meeting people, though it does show that someone can survive such a mixup just fine.
So it’s good to have a last name, company name, etc. just in case.
-Danny